Emotional Memory
by Gary Randolph

Here are some lines from a sketch we are working on called "Desperate."

Woman:
Twelve years. For twelve years my life had been cursed. I was still a young woman when I was struck with this illness. I had had prospects – hope. I would marry, have children and watch them grow up. Instead I watched my body wither, my youth fade. I spent all that I had seeking a cure from every doctor I could find. But year after year for twelve years I grew worse.

Jairus:
Twelve years. For twelve years my life had been blessed. I remember the first day I held her in my arms, so tiny and fragile. I vowed to take care of her, and for twelve years I worked to earn her food, her clothing, trinkets to make her happy. In return she was the delight of my life. Every evening when I walked through the door she greeted me with a squeal of, "Abba." I was just starting to see the beauty of her womanhood begin to bloom when suddenly she took ill. She quickly grew worse, and I feared she would die at just twelve years.

Pick one of the parts and give it a reading. If working in a group, ask for male and female volunteers and have a reading of each part. These two people are struggling with powerful emotions. How should an actor go about portraying those emotions?

Remember the movie billboards from the mid-1990s? Tom Hanks IS Forrest Gump. Certainly it was a great, Oscar-winning performance. But the promotional phrase may cause confusion in the minds of amateur actors. Did Tom Hanks put himself aside and become another person?

You can never and should never put yourself aside. Constantin Stanislavsky in "An Actor Prepares" wrote, "Never allow yourself externally to portray anything that you have not inwardly experienced." But applying that advice can be tricky. Let's say you were asked to play the part Forrest Gump, a man with a history of physical handicap, a man of limited intellect, a man who lived most of his life with an unrequited love. If you haven't had those experiences, then how can you get in touch with the emotions of the character?

Richard Boleslavsky in "Acting The First Six Lessons" tells the following story:

There once were two young people very much in love. The boy had proposed to the girl one fine summer evening as they walked in a cucumber patch. Being nervous, as they walked they would stop occasionally, pick a cucumber, and eat it, enjoying very much its aroma, taste, and the freshness and richness of the sun's warmth upon it. They made the happiest decision of their lives between mouthfuls of cucumbers.

A month later they were married. At the wedding dinner a dish of fresh cucumbers was served. Nobody knew why the couple laughed so heartily when they saw it.

Long years of life and struggle came; children, and, naturally, difficulties. Sometimes they quarreled and were angry. Sometimes they did not speak to each other. But their youngest daughter observed that the surest way to make peace between them was to put a dish of cucumbers on the table. Like magic they would forget their quarrels and would become tender and understanding.

For a long time the daughter thought this was due to their love for cucumbers. But when her mother told her the story of their engagement, the daughter saw a different reason.

What do you think went through the minds of these people when, later in life, they saw, smelled, or tasted cucumbers? Perhaps the scent or taste or greenness of the cucumbers took them back in their minds to that earlier time when all their future together stretched out before them? Probably you have had similar experiences. The smell of baking bread or a campfire or roses - the taste of hot chocolate on a cold day or of ice-cold lemonade on a steaming day - the sight of leaves turning in the fall - all these things can take us back to another time and place.

That rekindling of emotion is the key to our Forrest Gump problem. Unlike Forrest, I didn't wear leg braces as a child. But I can remember the feeling of being the worst kid on the team and physically unable to do things that other players could do. Unlike Forrest, I am not significantly less intelligent than the average. But I can remember the feeling of saying something very stupid in a crowd of people. My experiences are not like Forrest Gump's experiences, but my emotional reaction to my experiences could be very much the same as his reaction to his experiences. If the emotion is real, the performance will be real.

If you are working with a group of actors, take out a cell phone and pretend to take a call. Then tell them that you have just received a call that a gunman was seen entering the building. The police are on their way, but for now you need to take precautions. Then tell the actors to roll play that scenario. In one case when we did that, some actors peeked out the door while other actors yelled at them to get back. Frantic mothers worried about their children in another part of the building and had to be physically restrained from leaving the room. Some actors grabbed makeshift weapons while others scouted out hiding places. Without scripted lines or blocked out movement we had a convincing scene of fear and drama. Why? Our emotions were real.

What did Forrest Gump feel when he ran from one end of the country to the other? I don't know. I've never done that. But I can remember days when I came home from work entirely burned out, got on my bicycle and rode faster and faster until my troubles whipped away in the wind.

The only emotions I really know are the ones I have felt. The only context I have for those emotions are the experiences of my own life. But if I can find a memory from my life that awakens an emotion that might be like what my character is feeling, then I have a starting point. As I perform, I can awaken that memory, put it into the context of the character, and build a convincing, human character. When you create a character you take "starter-dough" from your own emotional history. Then add the particulars of this character, observation of other people, and input from the director and author.

Go back to the lines from "Desperate." Think about or discuss the feelings that the characters are experiencing. Have you ever felt anything similar to those feelings? If working with a group, ask for volunteers to share their experiences. Be sure to make it a safe place to share those experiences. Then read the part again or ask for volunteers to read both parts again. When I did this in a group, the second reading was so full of real emotion that it nearly brought tears to my eyes.

As a closing exercise your group could do one of the drama devotionals. The Thief's Family or Jacob's Triangle would be good for this.

Copyright (c) 2006, Over The Top Publishing.
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